We have a list of Drs. we can choose from

We have Blue Cross Blue Shield of Illinois…we have a list of Drs. we can choose from. Basic care is covered (like checkups). There are deductibles for some things. Dental is through a MetLife company.

Covers preventive stuff, like exams and cleanings, at 100% and other things at 80%. He pays about 200. per month–deducted by his employer–for this coverage. I’ve brought the boys to most of their Drs. appts. and have brought them to their first dental appts. as well….I want them to have the habit of going to the Dr./Dentist so they will keep doing it into adulthood. They also see that I go to the Dr./Dentist and that I take care of myself (as best I can) and that this is what one does.

I figure…if you are fortunate enough to have coverage…you should use it.

He is trying to get you to take care of him

I think he is trying to get you to take care of him. I know one woman who was in a situation almost exactly like yours and her husband got injured in a car crash – shortly after she’d prepared her exit plan (you need to do a yahoo group search for emotional abuse) You will find you are all married to the same man.

Anyway, when he was injured she had to lay out his clothes, wash him in the shower and help dress him. Well, she’s still doing it. And asking herself why? It’s really sad. Be careful and if you decide you want to leave do NOT tell him because even if he isn’t a physical abuser that can change in a second.

Many employers don’t have benefits – if there are no health problems it is fairly inexpensive – as low as $250 a month for some insurance – like here with blue cross. But in arizona even when we were making fair m oney, we couldn’t get insurance for me due to pre-existing.

Your post compels me to say something

I’m a lurker in this list. However, your post compels me to say something. It seems to me that someone who is employed, as your husband is, should have access to medical insurance, which covers basic medical needs such as yearly checkups and dental cleanings. Dental hypogene is important for heart health. I would opt for taking him and yourself to counseling. At least that is seeing one medical practitioner, who may influence him when you can’t.

Someone who pays no attention to basic medical needs such as dental and yearly checkups at age 46 has, in the words of Ann Landers, “a geranium in his cranium”, and may end up in an early grave.

And since I’m going back to lurker status, I do want to say before returning to it that the recommendations of this list of Dave Ramsey’s books is a great one. If you haven’t already started reading his books, I would suggest you do and start applying his methods for controlling debt. I’m on baby step one.